Aim High

High Society Darts
Fall 2012 Motto: Aim High

Turner's Ton-80

What started as just another Ship practice session at Bleecker Street Bar turned momentous today.  Even Phil Taylor's game-used darts were powerless, as Turner tossed a Ton-80 en-route to housing Rich in a game of 501. 

Turner was on fire all day, throwing Tons left and right, and dominating the Legs cash game.

Bullseye, Narcissus, and Self-Reflection: The Modernist Myth of Darts

Hello readers, welcome to the update. By my count, this is the 192nd darts update I've written. Nearly two hundred updates covering 14-plus seasons. Over one hundred and ninety different ways to describe what is essentially the same sequence of events each week. Don't get me wrong, this is not a complaint. In fact, I enjoy the doing write-ups, both the challenge and the fun of highlighting each week's get together. But maybe it's that it has been nearly nine years since we started, or maybe it's because I just had a high school reunion and I'm getting a little nostalgic, but suddenly I'm reflecting on the process of writing these weekly ditties.


They mostly start the same, hopefully with a jaunty little theme. Maybe some sort of riff on pop culture (and more recently a funny little picture right up there in the upper right-hand corner, just like a real newspaper), maybe a reference to a particularly funny part of the night, or maybe just some random connective tissue I have selected to bring the season together. We've reminisced about one hit wonders and enjoyed Oscar-winning movies. We've toured countries of the world and explored the music of the Beatles. Pictures, poems, limericks, and even the occasional anagram have been used to set the stage. As an example, this week I may have latched on to the ALCS game that was played last night between Boston and Tampa Bay as a suitable theme. If so, this section might perhaps tie our team's match (NB: while formally named Full of Ship, the team is most often referred to by the colloquial reference "The Ship") to the futility shown by Tim Wakefield and the Boston Red Sox in this game, such as "The Ship brought out a squad of wily veterans this night, looking to recapture some past glory, and teach a lesson to their upstart opponents."

After the pithy (snarky?) little intro, we then head into the description of the match itself, starting with Singles 501. S501 is always a fun section to write, because I get to use a lot of heavy-handed references to the aforementioned theme. I throw in a bunch of puns, hopefully a few hyperlinks to some hilarious and random internet content, and off we go. Plus, I love this section because I get to highlight the great games that we play individually. I know it's a team sport, but somehow the singles event seems to turn out the wild games, or ridiculously crazy throws or other unbelievable plays each week. Of course, sometimes nothing happens in S501. To continue on with our hypothetical example, this week's description might have read "Unfortunately, in S501, The Ship was slapped around like Wakefield's knuckler, as our opponents slapped two grand slams and left us on the short end of an 8-0 score after one round."

Next comes the always unheralded Cricket section. It is the poor second act of the write-up. The "middle child," if you will. The often overlooked Jan to the recap's Brady Bunch. By the time it arrives, all the good jokes have been taken by the S501 section. It doesn't have the resolution or dénouement of the D501 section. Plus, let's be honest, we kinda suck at Cricket, so it usually entails a lot of coverage of us losing, which is not that fun to write about. But I gamely give Cricket its due, and try not to mail it in too much, to get out the good things we deliver. So this week, it may have read: "Like Big Papi miraculously delivering a triple with the Red Sox hopelessly behind, Dave / Rich managed to pull one win out of the Cricket hat, to pull The Ship within twelve points after two rounds."

And finally we come to Doubles 501, which is invariably the most exciting part of the night. In the past, the games were worth two points, which really upped the excitement, because it usually meant that the winner of this round would win the night. Of course, it is the round that gave us the midget toss, so it will always hold a special place in my heart. But inherently it is thrilling because its got that awesome rhythm of double-in / double-out, where anything can happen (and often does). I always like to try and build up the tension in this part, creating a mystery around how the match turned out. And there is almost always some turn of events that tips the night one way or the other, which I get to wrap back to the theme to round out the update. And really, on the rare times they happen, there is nothing more satisfying than a smooth finish to the recap. To finish our example for the week, it may have ended like this: "The Ship picked up one more win from Rich / Dave in D501, but like the Red Sox they were unable to make the final score respectable, finishing with a 16-2 loss."

And that's it, really. I've never officially counted, but they probably average about 350 words a week. If I was really good, I might even be able to tell the full story in just three or four sentences. (as Blaise Pascal said, "I have made this letter longer than usual, only because I have not had the time to make it shorter.") As daunting as it seems each week, it's never as painful as I build it up to be. Somehow, there is always another way to tell the story, another phrase to turn, another participle to dangle. I almost always make the "deadline" for publication (i.e. the day before the next week's match). Have I repeated myself? Probably. Do I contradict myself? Yes (I am large, I contain multitudes.)

Oh yeah, there is one other piece to the update. Probably the most anticipated, most discussed, and easily the most lobbied for section - the Props. I'm not even sure what precipitated the creation of Props and the need to call out a weekly winner (as I said, it's a team game), but I think it's fair to say that the recap would have been dead long ago without this little gem. It is The Simpsons to the recap's Tracey Ullman Show, if you will, probably deserving of its own spin-off which would likely outlast its predecessor in fortune and glory. I probably take a perverse pleasure in handing out props, but always with an eye to spreading the wealth while acknowledging all manner of great performances. There is almost always something to celebrate, a random dart, a dominant performance, an upset win, and countless random acts. Of course, some nights I can be strapped and go completely off the board, and this week would probably have been one of those where I awarded: "Props - Carl Crawford / Willy Aybar, for knocking the Red Sox to the brink of elimination."

For anyone that made it this far, thanks for indulging me.  Now, and 191 other times.

Weekly Shippy Points (YTD Standings)

Player	Points	Notes
Rich	20	0 points in S501, 20 points in Cricket*, 15 points in D501
Dave	12	12 points in S501*, 4 points in Cricket, 6 points in D501
* High Throw in Round

You Oughta Be In Pictures

As you can tell from the season's worth of snapshots (and the "complete" team photo to the right), you oughta be in pictures, you’re wonderful to see. And, as proven by our outstanding season-long performance, you oughta be in the playoffs (and you are). (Click to continue...)

Caught In The Camera Eye

All the world’s indeed a stage, and we are merely dart players. Sitting in first place in the subdivision (in the basement bars...), The Ship is truly living in a fisheye lens, caught in the camera eye. Catch the mist, catch the myth, catch the mystery, catch The Ship. (Click to continue...)

Can You Picture That?

Dr. Teeth: Hey, Floyd, Pick a verse!
Floyd Pepper: Let me take your picture, add it to the mixture, there it is I got you now!

This week The Ship mixed up another batch of darts goodness, but there is no way that Floyd knew what was being added to the mixture this week. So now begins the changin' and mental rearrangin' that is the weekly update. (Click to continue...)

Pictures of Roger

OK, so it's not Lily. But here is a special picture just for Darian.

(Click to continue...)

Can You Picture What Will Be, So Limitless and Free

This is The Edge, beautiful friends, this is The Edge. My only friends, The Edge. Not even the major reconstruction could change all we know and love about The Edge. And what's not to like? There's great sushi right around the corner, Trivial Pursuit, beers, and even Donkey. Plus, The Ship notoriously plays well in its "home away from home" on Third Street. (Click to continue...)

This Freeze Frame Moment Can't Be Wrong

I could see it was a rough cut Tuesday, whatever the hell that means. But I do know that this week, there were no defects to be found on The Ship. After a relaxing three week layoff including a fantastic meal (see above), the squad was back and ready for action. (Click to continue...)

A Picture of Nectar

No words can adequately describe the fabulous night we had on our "off week", courtesy of Michael. Fantastic food, an amazing apartment, a roaring fire, great company. Just a spectacular evening.
Enjoy a few of the pictures.

I've Got (Pictures of) Friends In Low Places

Blame it all on the darts, or the tattooing tarts, who crashed our weekly affair. Whatever it was, there was a lot of strange things happening around the oche this week. But don't worry if you missed it, and don't try and deny it, 'cause we got pictures. (Click to continue...)

Every Picture Tells A Story Don't It

We all know that a picture is worth a thousand words, but more importantly, sometimes it's worth ten grand. So, on a night where we celebrated the beauty of art, The Ship set out to paint a masterpiece of its own. (Click to continue...)

Mama Don't Take My Kodachrome Away

When I think back on all the things I've seen in dart bars, it's a wonder I can think at all. Though my lack of aim hasn’t hurt me much, I can see the dartboard on the wall. But this week, The Ship had a tough time seeing anything, including the board. (Click to continue...)

Negative

No match this week. Enjoy photos from the archives.

Shake It Like a Polaroid Picture

The Ship don't mess around, because we loves the darts, and this I know fo' shooo..! With the baseball playoffs starting, it felt like a special night at SOF. Things started out on a high note, with the Red Sux losing big to the White Sox in the early game. Then, with the Yanks on every screen and the bar hopping, The Ship stepped up to the line riding a wave of enthusiasm. And just like the Yankees, boy did we deliver. (Click to continue...)

Photograph, All I’ve Got is a Photograph

Who's on first? This week, The Ship was on first. Facing off against the other 16-2 team for sole possession of first place, in a warm bar on First Ave with the Yankee game on. What's the point? I don't know. Third base. (Click to continue...)

Picture Book

Welcome back my friends, to the show that never ends. Each season, summer vacation seems to get shorter and shorter, and each season The Ship gets better and better. Just like slipping into an old pair of jeans, we comfortably eased back into the darts routine without missing a beat. So come inside, the show's about to start, and you'll need to see it to believe it. (Click to continue...)