George and Hooch (by Turner)

The Longest Dart

It has been quite a while since we've done a regular weekly update, but this week's "match" was so unique that it deserves to be memorialized.

The Society took to the boards this week as an optional match.  We were scheduled for the second of back-to-back bye weeks, but we opted to play a friendly game, with the chance to hang out at our home away from home, Society Billiards.  So, we accepted the invitation from The Gaf to join us for what we thought would be a casual night of darts, and to battle for the single extra point awarded to the bye week winner.  And what a battle it would become....

Things started out inauspiciously, although we should have realized that there was the potential for a problem when we split the first three matches of the night.  In the race to nine points, nothing had been decided, until Dave stepped up in the last game of S501 and swept both games.  5-3 for the Society, and things are looking good.

Cricket brought about more parity, as Rich / Scott split their first two games, and Dave / Andrew split their two games, making the score 7-5, heading in to the last round.   Luckily, the games were lasting a long time, as well, so not only was nothing being decided, but it was not being decided slowly.

Things started to run off the rails when Dave / Scott were swept in the first round of D501.  Suddenly, the score was tied, and someone got the brilliant idea to ponder what might happen if we ended the bye week match tied.  Who would get the extra point?  Wouldn't it be a waste of time to play, and have both teams end up with the same 8 points they would have had anyway?  So, texts were send in to the league, and the official NYDO rulebook was consulted, and it was determined that the official way to settle a tie was with a four-on-four 1001 battle royale.  But, there was still some work to be done before we knew if this would be necessary.

Despite looking good in the beginning of the game, Rich / Andrew dropped the first of their D501 matches by a slim margin.  High Society was now down 8-7, with one game left to play.  Coming out blazing hot, Andrew hit 60's left and right, and he nailed the win with a double-3, to send the teams into the Octagon to settle things once and for all.

After midnight, the teams lined up their rosters.  High Society was left to play with only three players, as Scott was the the only sensible, responsible person who went home to be with his family.  (We had not yet decided to play the 1001-off when he left.)  So Rich, Andrew and Dave lined up to take their lumps in what should have been a (long, drawn-out) formality to determine a winner for the night.

Quickly, High Society was on the ropes, down by over 200 points, as we were not only spotting the other team an extra player, but they were nearly throwing Ton-80's when they played.  Our string of Breakfasts was not quite getting it done, and we still had over 500 points on the board while they were nearly doubling out, creating the potential for a "virtual midget tossing".

But the beauty of '01 is that it ain't over till it's over, and when the other team stalled out on double-2, High Society had the chance to make up some ground.  Suddenly, we found ourselves actually "ahead," as we were facing double-1 to their double-2.  After many more rounds of anguish as both teams couldn't manage to put the game away, Rich managed to double out and put an end to the long evening. Hopefully the single extra point we received will be the deciding factor that will launch High Society into the playoffs at the end of the season.

I need a nap...

Home on a Monday

Can you guess where I'm writing from? Well, it's not the Las Vegas Hilton, unfortunately, and I'm not spinning The Wheel. This week was over the top, as we were playing to win and looking to make lonesome losers of the top ranked team. So quiet down, drop the bullhorn and use your "inside voice" as you read along with this week's update. (Click to continue...)

Alll Righty Then

The Ship is the world's darts leader. This is the recap it deserves.  Seen out and about this week - The Ship bringing its XY game out to the Ace Bar. Or, as Ace Venture might say, Holy Testicle Tuesday!

The all-macho lineup started out well for The Ship, with Rich and Michael sailing through the opening two games.  But then, we suddenly began to play as though there were a Naked Raygun pointed at our heads, and we surprisingly dropped four games in a row.  Suddenly we were in search of a win... and a clean pair of shorts.

I'm going to take a short time out of the write-up to go speak to myself.  If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer.

Rich / Andrew opened Cricket with a win n a close game, and then shanked it in the second game, struggling with darts that were clearly not "laces out," and sending them wide of the bullseye.  Dan Marino should die of gonorrhea and rot in hell.  In game two, Michael / Dave played one of the all time greats.  In an epic battle, they staged a huge comeback and nearly won game two by hitting clutch bulls.  Unfortunately, it wasn't to be, but they did earn a split.  Fred / John played together in a perfect fit, and bailed us out in the final round, sweeping two games and tying the match at six-all.

I'm going to take a another break, to go psyche myself up for the big finish.  If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer.

Entering the wee hours of the morning, Fred / John headed back out but lost a close game in which neither team could find Captain Winkie to end the game.  Dave / Michael exorcised the demons in game two, securing a big win.  But in the final game, Rich / Andrew had some trouble getting in, and lost with the "Dart Heard Round The World."  Hopefully the 10-8 loss won't turn us into the Mayor of Psychoville.

Props:Michael - 3 wins, endless bulls.  You must be tired of being right.

Titanic

Oh c'mon, you had to know that headline was coming. Yes, The Ship finally hit an iceberg and sank. With a supportive crowd on hand to watch, The Ship hit a wall and wasn't able to put together a typical strong outing. (Click to continue...)

Gladiators

Joey, do you like movies about gladiators? Well, our name is Gladiator. We fought and battled through a long season, and walked away with a very successful campaign.

Our final week didn't matter much in the standings, but we still put on quite a show in the Colusseum. In S501, we notched four wins, with Rich / Glenn / Fred & Rebecca all slaying the lions. We posted another four wins in Cricket, with two splits from Glenn / Andrew and Fred / Mindy, and a sweep from Rich / Rebecca. In the final round, we closed things out in style with a D501 sweep, to give us a big 14-4 win as we head to the playoffs.

And now on to the real fun...At my signal, unleash hell!

(Click to continue...)

Platoon

The Ship ain't meant to die! The only thing that can kill The Ship is The Ship. Unfortunately, this week The Ship went to war without a full squadron, making the battle this week particularly tough. (Click to continue...)

The Godfather, Part II

It is a rare occurrence when a sequel outshines the original, but this week was one of those rare times. In Week 5, Glenn had an outstanding week in our trip to Ace Bar, but this week he outdid himself and put on another one-man show. (Click to continue...)

Around The City In 80 Minutes

It's a wonderful city, if you'll only take the time to go around it. So tonight, The Ship mixed in some tours around Manhattan along with the usual evening of darts. (Click to continue...)

The Sting

It was March the last time we came up on the short end of the score, six matches ago. Playing against the first place team, The Ship sought to avoid the sting of losing by swatting the team from Barfly. (Click to continue...)

In The Heat of the Night

It was a hot, steamy night. Sahara hot. Habañero hot. HoTT. The multitude of candles on Fred's birthday cake only added to the heat. Even the rain couldn't cool off the city streets, and nothing could cool off The Ship. Riding a streak of four weeks without a loss, The Ship came into the match simmering and ready to boil. (Click to continue...)

It Happened One Night

It happened again! Very early last Friday morning, The Ship welcomed its second team mascot into existence. We've seen the effects of one mascot on our performance, so with two mascots on our side The Ship was due for a big week. And since we were going up against the 2nd place team this week, Arden came along at just the right time. (Click to continue...)

On The Waterfront

This week The Ship sailed along the East River, parked harbor-side, and set out to prove that we could be contenders, instead of bums. (Click to continue...)

All About Adam

You may be waiting for your morning coffee to brew, or waiting for your lunch order to arrive. While you wait you can read my update. It'll make minutes fly like hours. (Click to continue...)

The Godfather

I believe in darts. Darts has made my fortune. And once again, The Ship was given an offer it couldn't refuse, to play darts downtown on a Tuesday night. (Click to continue...)

Midnight Cowboys

Like sands through the hourglass... a long day that started in Tokyo was made even longer by The Ship's leisurely-paced match with DeezNuts. (Click to continue...)

Rebecca

Last night, I dreamt we went to The Ship again... Seeking to unravel the mystery of darts and exercise the ghosts of defeat, we took on the Hands of Doom. (Click to continue...)

Deer Hunting

In the midst of a snowstorm, The Ship took refuge in the a wooden lodge in the middle of the city. Sitting in front of a roaring fire and underneath a stuffed deer head put The Ship in the mood to hunt. (Click to continue...)

Rocky Start

The Spring 2004 season kicked-off with much anticipation, as the re-vamped squad hit the field. (Click to continue...)

About Darts

Dear Ndugu,

I believe I mentioned in my last letter that I play on a darts team. We get together every Tuesday at a local bar, and play against some other teams from the area. It's a friendly outing and really a good time. But recently, I've begun looking at the other teams in the league and wondering "Who are these annoying people in our bar?" Everything they do annoys me. I hate the way they complain about our scorekeeping, I hate the way they needlessly point when they are already way ahead, I hate the way the sit, I hate way they smell, I hate the way they root for "Rye bread".

(Click to continue...)